Every once in a while you’ll read a story that’ll make you go, “Damn, why is my life so uneventful?” All of you are out there in the midst of the drama and I’m at home eating pizza in my bed. Sometimes I want to trade with you guys, but, well, pizza and bed.

Twitter user @lilcanon is definitely one of those people who have crazy stories worth reading about. The drama is actually unreal. And it all started with Alexa…